Adoptees: Teachers?

I came across a post recently at Amanda’s The Declassified Adoptee blog that asked the question: is it the job of the adopted to teach?

I strongly believe it is our job to help educate those who may not understand that:

  • Many of us deal with unacknowledged, unprocessed, unexplainable grief.
  • Many of us have trouble attaching ourselves to other human beings.
  • Many of us are overwhelmed with sadness on our birthday.
  • Many of us are thankful we were adopted and love our adoptive families in the same way people who aren’t adopted love their families.
  • Many of us feel guilty if we express a desire to understand our biological heritage.

Yes, it is our job to teach. In a compassionate, non-judgemental way, we can influence the future; we can help pave the way for change so those children who are being adopted today and tomorrow will have a different experience. They will be able to celebrate who they are without shame and the burden of living in the shadow of secrets.

More than our job, I believe it is our honor to teach. It is why I am writing my book.

What do you think?


I’m a writer, reader, and creative. I thought by now I’d have things figured out, but I keep coming up with more questions. I think that’s okay. I’m here most mornings pondering ordinary things.
  1. I have a dear friend with three adopted children, and I know that she is sometimes frustrated by society’s lack of understanding (and sometimes lack of empathy) for the adoptive process. I think that anything either of you do to educate the rest of us is definitely a positive.

  2. Not being adopted, I am unfamiliar with all the problems adoptees face, so this was actually news to me. I just started following you (I wondered what happened to the Velvet Room), and I just wanted to say thank you for the comment on my blog about my new iPad. I don’t try to compose on it, because I have much more difficulty with a virtual keyboard than this nice one here. Glad to know you love yours, too!

    1. Welcome DJan! I’m glad you found me; thank you for following!

  3. I can hardly wait to read your book!

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