I came across a post recently at Amanda’s The Declassified Adoptee blog that asked the question: is it the job of the adopted to teach?
I strongly believe it is our job to help educate those who may not understand that:
- Many of us deal with unacknowledged, unprocessed, unexplainable grief.
- Many of us have trouble attaching ourselves to other human beings.
- Many of us are overwhelmed with sadness on our birthday.
- Many of us are thankful we were adopted and love our adoptive families in the same way people who aren’t adopted love their families.
- Many of us feel guilty if we express a desire to understand our biological heritage.
Yes, it is our job to teach. In a compassionate, non-judgemental way, we can influence the future; we can help pave the way for change so those children who are being adopted today and tomorrow will have a different experience. They will be able to celebrate who they are without shame and the burden of living in the shadow of secrets.
More than our job, I believe it is our honor to teach. It is why I am writing my book.
What do you think?

I have a dear friend with three adopted children, and I know that she is sometimes frustrated by society’s lack of understanding (and sometimes lack of empathy) for the adoptive process. I think that anything either of you do to educate the rest of us is definitely a positive.
Not being adopted, I am unfamiliar with all the problems adoptees face, so this was actually news to me. I just started following you (I wondered what happened to the Velvet Room), and I just wanted to say thank you for the comment on my blog about my new iPad. I don’t try to compose on it, because I have much more difficulty with a virtual keyboard than this nice one here. Glad to know you love yours, too!
Welcome DJan! I’m glad you found me; thank you for following!
I can hardly wait to read your book!