In a four months I will be 50. Where did all the years go? Does everyone ask that question when they reach that milestone? In some form or another, I believe that they must.

It was yesterday that I was a young woman awaiting the birth of my first baby. A daughter. I was certain.

No, it was a thousand years ago. Another lifetime. Another woman.

The truth. It was both.

I am settling into the woman whom I have become. I am making peace with her as well as the young woman who brought me to this place. I am forgiving the mistakes that the younger one made. I am looking forward to the future ahead of the older one.

This is the life that I have been given. This is the life that I have chosen. This is both.

I look forward – and still behind.

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I’m a writer, reader, and creative. I thought by now I’d have things figured out, but I keep coming up with more questions. I think that’s okay. I’m here most mornings pondering ordinary things and the thin places where faith intersects.
  1. I love this posting. Beautiful writing!! Blessings, Barbara

  2. I well remember turning 50 and reflecting back on what I’ve accomplished. This next decade is not so bad though! Great post!

  3. Birthdays do cause us to look back but also to look forward. The day I turned 50 I decided to go back to school and get another degree–best thing I ever did for myself!

  4. I’m right there in the 49-y.o. boat with you. May we have smooth sailing, or at least a minimum of big scary waves and undertows.

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